Wednesday, January 12



Ok this is ridiculous. It must sound like a joke but it isn't. I came home tonight and again smelled the faint aroma of pee pee and frantically looked and sniffed around my new couch which was still in it's shrink wrap (It wasn't unwrapped because it was delivered 9am this morning).

I realized he wouldn't have done that so I walked into my bedroom and headed for my other tall plant and sure enough when I bent down I smelled it.

Me: Mingus what is your deal, seriously? I mean are you having trouble finding your litter box? You're not pooping outside the box. Wait isn't that like an educational saying. No that's, "Thinking outside the box."

Mingus: Moron.

Me: Shadddup. What's the deal? do you not like the new apartment?

Mingus: No I'm fine I just don't feel comfortable until my smell is permanently attached to this new place. You must understand?

Me: No not really. I can't say I do.

Mingus: Didn't you once wear the same pair of jeans for 85 straight days?

Me: Don't change the topic, we're talking about you.

There's no talking to that cat. He just sits there and stares at me and then stares at the wall. On a sidenote I think that when cats stare up at the wall they see ghosts that we can't see. Either that or they're just really stupid.

Ok I think I figured out the entire thing. I realized I put new potting soil in both of those plants and the soil was very moist and soft. It must have gotten his attention and felt like nice soft litter or something, so he pissed on it. Fair enough, you would have done the same thing. But not me. You animal.

If that mop of fur pisses on my new couch though I'm going to saute him with some scallions and water chesnuts..With a side of wasabi mashed potatoes. I'm hungry.


At 2:14 PM, Blogger Lizzi said...

My poor poor little Mingus man. He must really hate you.

At 12:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mingus is a saint.

For the past 6 month I've had a dog that hates me. Her name is Lily - half lab half besenji (whatever that is). Her hatred for me sort of works to my benefit since I never have to walk the mutt. All those duties fall upon the wife. If it's just me and the dog in the house she will not get out of her crate for anything. Days will pass without a paw print on the carpet until the wife returns.

Anyway, Lily sleeps on the floor in the bedroom. However one night as I slept soundly under the covers I awoke to my wife standing over then bed shining a flashing at me. I said, "What are doing woman?" She responds, "What's all over the comforter?" I look down at the comforter directly over my chest, and see what can only be decribed as a large, moist, warm mound of yellow and brown vomit on my chest. Nothing like cleaning vomit off a comforter at 4 AM. I guess she had something to say to me and finally had to courage to say it. In conclusion, I'd trade Lily and pet to be named later for Mingus anytime - pending league approval of course.


At 7:45 PM, Blogger ms. jared said...

that is one gorgeous cat. i love him and i don't even know him. pee pee problems or not.

yes, when i grow up i want to be a scary cat lady.

xoxo, jared

At 11:23 PM, Blogger allyson said...

Now that, that's funny. Both yours and poor Scott's stories.


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